Ah, A Christmas Carol! Ah My Goddess Fan Fiction
by Stargoat
Summary: Keiichi meets three spirits that teach him the real meaning of Christmas. Sort of.


**Chapter 1**

It was Christmas Eve in the common room at Tarikihongan Temple. Dinner was over, everyone had drunk their fill of tea. Keiichi stretched his arms and said to no one in particular, "I'm going to bed. Good night everyone!"

Peorth, Urd, and Skuld grunted at him, engrossed in their television program. Belldandy, knitting in the corner, beamed at him and said, "Good Night Mr. Keiichi!" Keiichi got up, walked to the washroom, washed his face, brushed his teeth, put on his t-shirt and sleep pants, and then tucked himself into his futon and almost immediately fell asleep.

It was perhaps midnight when he woke up. He felt a presence in his room. "I thought we were over this, Peorth."

"No, it is I, Peorth Marley, your former business, wait, why AM I The one in chains?" Peorth was wrapped in a funereal shroud, chains, rose vines covered with thorns, a number of locks that served no particular purpose, and more chains. Keiichi thought it was somewhat becoming, but then remembered he was annoyed.

"Peorth, get out."

"Well, I can't. Not until I tell you that there will be three spirits visiting you..."

Keiichi interrupted, "Right. Urd will be the ghost of Christmas Past, Belldandy will be the Ghost of Christmas Present, and Skuld will be the ghost of Christmas future. Yeah, I saw that one,"

"No, uh, it won't be like that at allllll! Boo, I'm a scary ghost. You should be scared." Keiichi shook his head. Peorth grabbed the collar of Keiichi's t-shirt and held his head close to her face. "Now behave or I'll put you in these chains and get inventive, bucko."

Diminutively, Keiichi said, "I'll be good."

"That's what I thought." She dropped his collar. "Now go back to sleep and wait for the first spirit!"

As Keiichi turned around to go to sleep on his futon, Peorth took out a giant hammer and hit Keiichi on the head with it. He passed out.

**Chapter 2**

"Oh, honestly Keiichi, it's not like we don't have things to do." Urd was shaking him.

"What, huh? Where's Peorth?"

"Who's Peorth," asked Urd. She dropped him somewhat roughly, jumped to the foot of his futon, and assumed a provocative pose. Urd was wearing a white toga cut quite closely in some places with very little material in others. She wore a belt of poinsettia flowers. "I'm the Ghost of Christmas Past!" Her pose became less provocative, and more silly.

"Urd, Belldandy and I have a lunch tomorrow. Can you please let me get some sleep."

"Not Urd, Christmas Past." An Urd-Bolt shot past Keiichi's ear and Urd glared.

"Uh, right, Christmas Past."

She grabbed Keiichi's wrist. "Let's go look at the Christmases of your childhood!"

Keiichi found himself traveling backwards in time. He knew he was going backwards in time because suddenly there were a number of clocks. The hands on the clocks were moving backwards and the clocks themselves were making backward chiming noises. Cuckoo birds sang "ookcuC, ookcuC." Keiichi said, "I really have to be up in the morning." Urd ignored this.

"Gaze upon your childhood in wonder."

Keiichi was back on Hokkaido. There was a lot of snow. Keiichi's Mom had bought a Christmas tree and the whole family was setting it up together inside the Morisato home. Megumi was maybe four and running around the tree in a childish ecstasy. She was supposed to be stringing popcorn, but had gotten too excited to continue.

"Wow, I forgot about this," Keiichi said. "Yeah, this was our first tree. It was now that I decided I really like Christmas."

Urd put her head on Keiichi's shoulder. "There you are, you used to be so cute. What happened?"

A very small Keiichi came out of kitchen holding a Christmas Star. Keiichi's dad picked up his son and they put the star on the top of the tree together.

"Thanks for showing me this, Urd, but I really do need to be up in the morning."

"Eh, whatever." Urd grabbed Keiichi's wrist and they traveled back to his room. "See you in the morning. And listen, there's no better time to kiss a girl than on Christmas. It's romantic. So don't screw it up."

"Urd, get out."

"Fine, but before I do, you have to be asleep before the next ghost visits. So drink this." Urd shoved a vial under Keiichi's nose.

"No way." Urd glowered threateningly. "OK." Keiichi put it in his mouth but did not swallow. Urd slapped him on the back, Keiichi gagged, and the potion went down. Keiichi immediately passed out.

**Chapter 3**

"Mr. Keiichi, Mr. Keiichi, are you alright?"

Keiichi was not entirely sure where he was, but Belldandy was close, very close. Keiichi lifted his head and saw down the cleavage of Belldandy's substantial bosom. He made a half-strangled noise of shock.

Belldandy appeared not to notice. "Oh good, I'm so pleased you're awake and unharmed." She stood up and bowed. "I am the ghost of Christmas Present and I am very pleased to meet you." She was wearing a long velvet green dress with a beautiful set of flowers for a necklace.

Keiichi smiled. "I wish a ghost like you would stay by my side forever."

Belldandy beamed. "I cannot grant wishes because I am a ghost, not a goddess, but I will happily stay by your side for the next hour or so." The two gazed at each other in contentment.

"So where are we going?"

Belldandy looked a little unsure. "Oh, well, let's see. Where would you like to go?"

"I don't care, just so long as I'm with you."

"Well, in that case," she took his hand in hers, helped him gently to his feet, and they walked through the door and into the Auto Club dorm. "They cannot see us, because we are invisible due to my Goddess powers. Notice how happy these two friends are together on this Christmas Eve."

Tamiya and Otaki were sitting under a kotatsu drinking beer. Tamiya was saying, "So if we win da race, then de Auto Club will have enough funds for our annual outin'. When we travel to Moto'car Museum in Ishikawa."

"Nah, Tami-chan, we were kicked out of there six years ago with lifetime bans. Don't you remember how mad She was?"

"Oh yeah Ota-chan. Well, maybe we can send someone in dere to get a copy of da drawings." Tamiya looked up. "Oh, Merry Christmas Morisato, we were just talking about you."

Keiichi was nonplussed. "Uh, you were?"

"Yes. Today have entered the Auto Club into the highly prestig... Mor-i-sa-to, why is there a girl standing behind you inside the confines of the sacred men-only Auto-Club Dorm?"

Belldandy looked confused, but then said, "Oh yes, I'm a ghost and not a goddess, that's why we're not invisible!"

In very short order, they were dumped on the concrete outside of the sacred men-only Auto-Club Dorm. Keiichi and Belldandy landed comfortably. They had some practice at this and were not particularly perturbed. "That did not sound good," said Keiichi. "I wonder what kind of stupid race they have entered us in this time."

The young couple brushed themselves off and walked home to the Tarikihongan Temple, which took most of the rest of the hour. It was chilly in his pajamas, but Belldandy took Keiichi's arm. Between Keiichi's excited heart and Belldandy's happy glow, they had more than enough warmth for the snowy walk back.

Keiichi and Belldandy quietly went back to his room. "I'm glad we were able to spend Christmas Eve together," said Keiichi. Belldandy sat down on Keiichi's futon, took Keiichi's hand and gently compelled him to lie down with his head in her lap.

"Me too," Belldandy said, "But now I must leave. You will be visited by one more spirit."

"Can we skip that part?" asked Keiichi. "Skuld's just going to get mad and drop Skuld-bombs on me."

As Belldandy covered him in his comforter, she said, "No, I'm sorry, Mr. Keiichi. Traditions light the past, brighten our present, and guide our future. And now you need to sleep."

"But if I stay awake that means Skuld won't be able to..." Belldandy interrupted by touching his lips with her front finger, leaned forward and kissed Keiichi gently but forcefully on his lips. He fell asleep instantly.

**Chapter 4**

A very squeaky voice was saying, "I am the Ghost of Christmas future!" Keiichi looked up and saw Skuld dressed in a black robe with a cowl. "Unless you change your stupid ways..." Skuld looked at Keiichi for the first time, spotted lipstick on Keiichi's mouth, and then Belldandy's dress, which she had apparently removed rather than wake him.

The little goddess, half strangled with rage, yelled, "FILTHY!" The magic began to fly. "IDIOT!" Violent spells were going off all over the room. "PERVERT!" Keiichi ducked as best he could. The room was being destroyed.

In the real world it was early morning. Keiichi was sleeping on his futon where Skuld had a number of diodes attached to his head and back to Mr. Dream Machine. "It's not supposed to take that much magic," she said worriedly. Mr. Dream Machine began smoking and then exploded with a loud bang. Keiichi woke up and instantly ascertained what was going on. Skuld shrieked, "Eek!" jumped up and ran out of the room. Keiichi shouted "Skuld!" and ran after her.

Urd stuck her sleepy head outside of the door to her room, saw the smoke, Skuld running, and Keiichi chasing her, diodes still hanging from his head. "What day is it?" asked Keiichi as he ran by.

"Christmas Day."

Keiichi stopped in front of the eldest of the Norn. "I want Urd Bolts for Christmas. Just for ten minutes."

Urd smiled mischievously and snapped her fingers.

Belldandy, Peorth, and Urd, dressed in their warm winter robes, watched Keiichi, diodes still attached, chasing a howling Skuld around the snowy temple grounds. He blasted her with Urd-Bolts every time she slowed down or presented a good target.

Peorth judged appraisingly. "You know, I think it's good he's getting that out of his system."

Belldandy and Urd nodded solemnly in agreement.


End file.
